The breaking up of two people is probably one of the saddest, and the most painful things you will ever go through. You, and others that know you, will remember the two of you in happier times. And now, sadness and heartbreak is the term that defines you two now.
However, although most of the time, as it affects both of you, the one who does the breaking up, survives a whole lot better then the one that was rejected.
As for the both of you, I am sure when you two got together, things were just perfect, and you enjoyed each other very much. But something happened here? What was it? Years together? growing apart? Financial? Sexual?
You don't remember the days, you remember the moments
But for most of the time, you will find that one of you has decided that they didn't love the other as much as they thought. Maybe both of have realized this? As we are all different people, we get to know each other a little better as time passes.
And one of you will start to realize that you are not as compatible as you thought. Yes, lust generally starts things, but after the sex, there has to be something more. You have to get along. You have to mesh with each other. There in lies the problem that leads to breaking up.
And breaking up has a lot to do with the differences in us.
Since our personalities are different, the longer we know each other, the more we may find differences in each other that we don't like.
If things don't seem to be going well with the person in your life, you need to be honest and tell them. You both need to talk about what is happening before you end up breaking up.
The moment you start feeling these things! You both can talk about it and see if things can work out. Holding on to someone's heart and letting them love you more and more every day is cruel!
If you two don't have a lot of time invested, it is easier to let someone go before the love and affection grow deeper and deeper. By doing this you are inflicting pain and sorrow that needs not to be done. Remember, what comes around, goes around.
Also, if you really have no intentions to settle down, then don't see someone exclusively. If your plans are to date, or see another person or persons if the opportunity arises, then say so from the beginning.
Don't use this person until the next person comes along. Just date this new person in your life. After all, you have really no intention to settle down or get married, so date them. Not all the time, but until you have decided that this is someone that you could spend your life with. Then you don't have to deal with the pain of breaking up.
This also gives this person that you like the opportunity to do the same. Who knows, they may not end up choosing you. Don't be selfish!
By acting responsibly in love, you will never have to go through some of the stupid excuses like "I found someone else". Or "I want to see other people". Or, "You deserve better". Or "it's not going to work, we're different, and don't belong in each others lives". That's a mouthful!
Listen, no one likes being lonely. Period! Being lonely has to be the very worse feeling in the world. Everyone wants to share life's journey, and their time with someone that likes them. Just don't use them.
And for all of you that are coming out of a divorce, use your head! If you don't know it by now, or haven't spoke with a shrink, you need to know about
There will be feelings of loss, being lonely, being scared, and a multitude of other feelings that will overwhelm you, and I am sorry. When you meet another person who shows interest, and they make you feel so good, date them only. Or even become friends with benefits if it suits you.
I wish I could take the hurt away, but you are the only one that will be able to do this. And it is going to take time. How much time you ask? It depends on your personality. I'm a Pisces, the most emotionally sensitive sign in the zodiac. I hate this part about me but have always been that way. I am strong in life and in business, but not here.
You don't have to believe in astrology, but you do need to realize we all are different. Some people are shy, some people are brass. Some people are brutally honest and will not sugar coat anything to save your feelings, and then there is Scorpio who is the sexiest of all the signs. (my partner is a Scorpio. How lucky I am) See what I mean? We all are all different and we all have different strengths and weaknesses. So how long will it take depends on who you are.
When breaking up, you can be over it in a day and say to yourself, it's their loss and press on. Or, you can be like most of us and it can take years, or even a lifetime.
The hardest part of breaking up is your memories. As you see at the top of the page, my motto is ...love remembers. Because it does! If you didn't remember all this love that was shared, it would be very easy. But love does remember.
You think of times you held each other, laughed and cried, and made love with each other. All the things that you ever did floods back to your memory and you ask yourself, why? They say if you want peace in your life, never ask why. If you are reading this, it's probably not the first article you have read on breaking up.
And you might think that you will find that one article that stops the pain, and erases the memories. I'm am sorry but the old adage, time heals all wounds, is still the answer you are looking for. Because it does most of the time. And sometimes, you will live with it for the rest of your life, but will become easier.
Breaking up tears you apart. You can't eat, you can't sleep, you can't work, you are sad, lonely, hurt, depressed, and you don't even know who you are anymore, do you?
This love was and still is a part of you. You feel lost after breaking up. The grief of losing a love is compared to losing someone that dies. Some professionals have even said it is a worse pain then death. When someone dies in your life, they didn't want to leave you. When someone kicks you to the curb, they purposely are discarding you. This grief is excruciating. And like losing someone in death, there has to be a mourning period when breaking up.
Man being a social animal, it is but obvious that you are bound to have close and intimate relations with a certain set of individuals and to maintain a good relationship, you must always remember not to hurt someone who cares for you. You set the foundations of such relations on mutual trust and faith. The deeper the trust, the more it can hurt. Misunderstandings are inevitable and things are not always the way they appear to be.
Do not clutch at that which is fading, whether perception, pattern, or even old things and people we once loved. When something leaves our life, it is a clear sign a chapter is over, whether we want that or not. And every void will be filled by what is natural to our evolved Self.
by Robert Wilkinson
After breaking up you need to cry those tears of pain out. Cry till you can't cry another tear. Let the pain and sorrow leave you body. The only way to stop thinking of this person is to keep your mind busy.
Did you know that you mind cannot think of two things at the same time? You can't! So keep yourself busy doing anything you can. Keep friends and family near and lean on them. Fill your life and your schedule with everything you can to keep busy.
Do whatever it takes to stop the memories, and asking the question why. Be grateful for the time you spent together, it's over, so recognize that, and press forward. I know it doesn't seem possible but it is the only answer. I know sometimes you feel you two were one. You two were so good together.
The problem with that thinking is the other person didn't feel the same way. How could that be, you ask, when they told me countless times how much they loved me? I can't answer that. That's all I know is that is what happens. How a person can love you so much, and then with a flip of a light switch, they don't any longer?
Seek professional help from breaking up you are feeling really bad or have harmful thoughts about yourself or the other person. Start exercising to relieve some stress and do whatever it takes to put these memories behind you. It will go away, but not without the pain, as love remembers.
If you've had more then a few dates with the person,you owe this person a face-to-face, one on one, sit-down.
If you're a total coward, the phone can be an acceptable means of breaking up this relationship, but only if the time you have spent together has been a short one!
I Miss U Tonight...
It is sad when people you know, become people you knew....
It is one of life's tragedies when you meet someone that you know is meant to be but due to unexpected circumstances and misunderstandings becomes someone you knew.
Or when you can walk right past someone that at one time in your life was a big part of your life... and how you used to be able to talk to them for hours about the little nothings in life...
and now you can barely look at them and they at you... and all you have left is that aching feeling in your soul...
We see what we want in the people we love. Romance can be blinding.
by Ellie Crystal
Lyrics:Well hello there,
my it's been a long long time
How am I doin',
oh well I guess I'm doin' fine
It's been so long now and it seems thatIt was only yesterday
Mmm, ain't it funny how time slips away
How's your new love,
I hope that he's doin' fine
Heard you told him, yes baby
That you'd love him till the end of time
Well you know, that's the same thingthat you told me
Well it seems like just the other day
Mmm, ain't it funny how time slips away
Gotta go now,
guess I'll see you hanging round
Don't know when though, oh
Never know when I'll be back in town
But I remember what I told you
That in time your gonna pay
Well ain't it surprisin' how time slips away
Yeah, ain't it surprisin' how time slips away...
Your Little Miracle
The miracle is your ability to accept the gifts, withstand the stress, pressure, fear and anxiety and still find something (or someone) to live for, laugh at, and love with and most of allENJOY in spite of everything.
If someone is taken, you might want to cool your heels and do not pass Go. There's no reason to share affections with anyone. You are loving, compassionate and more than worth the effort it takes to have you. Say that, and say it firmly -- to them, but also to yourself.